WELCOME TO OFF COLOR

WELCOME TO OFF COLOR

9:43 AM A few weeks passed since I wrote my first #dearrunning post (read it again here). I thought it's the perfect time to write my second dedication during the OCEAN WEEK.
I love writing about running and sharing my passion for it! During the last weeks, I still worked on my recovery, but also ups and downs happened again. When I introduced this series, I told you that I want to share more happy moments that I experience via running...maybe introducing you to a world which is new, but super exciting to discover as well.

Two weeks ago, I noticed that running has also "dark sides" and this issue that I experienced is something I wish more people would talk about.

Let's get to the topic (I don't want to bore you with too many words).
While my recovery is doing pretty well, I was excited to run more. Also, when the sun came out and spring finally sprung, I decided to start shorts season. In total, I feel pretty okay in my body, but sometimes I feel uncomfortable running in shorts.
A while ago, I wrote a post about body positivity - I talked about being a female with curves. Something wrong about it? I guess not.

Still, when it comes to being active, I feel weird in my body. I wear tights which highlight my curves and my shorts put a huge focus on my thighs and butt, because that's how it is...
I don't dress like that to impress or play with my body image - I just want to adjust to the climate and that's why I enjoy running in shorts.
While there are millions of people who don't care about the running clothes in any season, there are others whom bother the warm season where tights are gone and the shorts get shorter.

I woke up and decided to go with my Nike shorts - pretty simple and I felt comfortable, because my butt was well covered. When I started running my circles around the lake, I saw many females, but also guys...I noticed that EVERY female I crossed, gave me a weird look. I felt my muscles bouncing up and down during running and I know shorts move a bit when you start moving your body, but I didn't show anything to anyone.
The faces I got simply hurt me. I was turning up the volume of my music and I asked myself why they keep staring at me like that. One woman was checking me up and down and she shook her head. I would be rude right now and use bad names or curse you, but hey, I'm grown up and I try to ignore it.

Yeah, I try to ignore it, but that's not easy. I ran faster and I just wanted to escape the scenery. What is going on here? I was totally confused and I didn't care about my run anymore.
I was happy when I was home and took a shower.
I checked myself in the mirror and I just felt disgusting. I know about my body, but I do so many active things that I actually thought I'm over body shaming or any kind of mobbing.

It's hard to believe, but all the women judging me were heavier than me. How can this be?

I don't care what size you wear and if you work out- I accept every human being. I feel sad that I invest so much and I don't get any respect - I get laughter and weird faces. This is not supportive and especially frustrating.

Right now, where women talk about feminism so much and sisterhood is so important, I wish there was more support. More high fives and more body confidence.

How shall I feel good about my body when no one gives me the feeling of being allowed to feel confident?

My sister told me to be proud of my butt, because other people pay for something like that. I just want to cover it as much as I can and hide it... because I'm not ready yet to face all that negativity. (How weird is that statement?)

Dear runners, how do you deal with that?
One question. Is running only allowed for skinny people with no curves? Does every athlete need to look the same? Will you ever stop judging curvy women?
Dear running, I really love you and I am happy how you changed my body and my whole being. I wish you could also teach me how to deal with this negativity sometimes and I hope there will be more curvy people who speak up. THOSE People really don't know how much we invest. Can we please love each other more?

Dear running, I will try to be more confident and I try to keep on wearing shorts. Being proud of my curves, my thighs, cellulite and everything that comes along.

Sisters, if you experience the same thing - holla at me! Let's talk about this!
We are in this together!!

Today is Global Running Day - please let us live. Let us run with passion and let us bounce as much as we want to. The next time you see someone running and this person happens to have beautiful curves, give her a high five! Smile at her and give her a good feeling.


Happy Global Running Day to all of you running lovebirds! ~



Powered by Blogger.